What to Do When You Don’t Know What to Do by Cloud and Townsend

As a book review blogger for Thomas Nelson, I received Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend’s book, What to Do When You Don’t Know What to Do earlier this week. I was surprised at how small the book was when I first got it. But this isn’t a review on how the book looks, so let me get into my review.

Summary
If I could describe this book in a few sentences, I would say that it is a short book on “right to the point” principles on how to to biblical handle trials and hardships in your life. The advice in this book probably isn’t anything that you haven’t heard before, but the difference is that it is clearly being said, and Cloud and Townsend support their advice with solid biblical references.

My Thoughts
What I enjoyed most about this book also was one of my annoyances – it was really short. I read it within a couple of hours. The brevity of the book leaves the reader with really impactful principles, but I wonder how well such a short book would connect with someone who is sincerely looking for answers. In my experience in pastoral counseling, sometimes the quick answer isn’t the helpful answer.

The truth is that everything that Cloud & Townsend offers is simply what the book says it is about – principles. Principles in their definition implies clarity and simplicity, so a long drawn out book concerning principles would be an oxymoron in itself. Here are a couple of things that I found insightful:

• …personal valuse are not created in a vacuum; they are formed in the contect of community
• Sometimes we have to take responsibility for situations that are not our fault…Determining who is at fault in your situation isn’t nearly as important as determining who will do something about it…What matters most is taking ownership through God’s strength and wisdom to d o something about it.
• …expect pain as a regular part of life…the more we bluster, the harder it is to learn the first lesson of trouble: It must be accepted as a normal part of life.
• View your problems as the next steps of growth for you.
• The steps: Set goals, record progress, gather resources, acquire information, identify tasks, evaluate progress, explore preferences, remain flexible, pray continually, pace yourself.

Of all the things that this book covers, the main point that spoke to me was the importance of being vulnerable with you trials and problems in the context of close relationships. In my life, I know that I can be isolated. If I was to be at fault in handling life’s problems, it would be in this way. As a pastor, you sometimes feel the need to be guarded. You feel like there is an unwritten rule that pastors are not allowed to have pain, feel depressed, or go through trials – much less share it with others. But that’s not biblical. It’s not healthy. It’s not right.

So would I recommend this book? Sure. In fact, I think I’d like to stock a few in my library just to give out.

I could say yes…but that would be lying

Genesis 41:15-16

I’m sure as Joseph was approached by Pharaoh, he could have said, “Yes…I have been known to successfully interpret dreams.  In fact, I’ve been doing the whole ‘dream thing’ since I was a kid.”

But he didn’t.

That’s what makes him a better man than me.

Often times I find myself taking credit for things that I can do.  Take music.  I have been playing music since I was 5.  I went to a high school of performing arts. I graduated with a degree in music. I have a resume of professional music experience.

“I” “I” “I” “I” “I” “I”…

I sound like such a conceited fool. According to “normal” standards, I am led to believe that all the accomplishments in my life are my right to boast in.  But the truth is this:

James 4:6
“ God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble.”

Whether or not I can take credit for things accomplished in life, the greater truth is this – I screw up all the time and constantly fall short.

I need grace.

So whether I deserve it or not, giving the Lord credit for all things is sometimes always better than taking the credit myself.

Gratitude in the wrong direction

Am I lying to myself?

Am I taking feelings of thankfulness for God’s blessings in my life as feelings of thankfulness towards God?

During my devotions today, I found myself pausing over Luke 17:11-19.  It’s a story I’m familiar with. I’ve read it plenty of times, and have even taught through the passage.  But today I was gripped to answer a question:

Where have I mistakenly attributed thankfulness towards the good in my life instead of towards the Lord?

To my Dunn Bros Community

This is for the community of people from MGEFC that meets at Dunn Bros on Sunday nights.

We are in our third week of asking “The Hard Questions.”  If you can’t seem to find the post where the questions were asked, here they are again:

• I have a friend who has been really influenced by information concerning biblical interpretation and the differences between them has been bothering her. Here’s the question:
• How important is it to have a “certain” translation?
• Even more so, what about the translations done by missionaries to unreached people groups? If those translations are not as accurate as the many English versions we have, are those people hearing the “real” gospel too?
• As someone who has lost a few loved ones in the last 2 years, I wonder how does one grieve while still being excited about the fact that their loved one is in the presence of God?
• How does God feel about divorce really?!
• When dealing with the GLBT community how does one truly show the Love of Christ without hiding your faith but not coming across as judgmental?
• Are all sins really equal or do some of gods commandments or “rules” carry more weight than others?
• This may be too abstract but here goes: Any recommendations on how to “live in the world but not be of the world”? I seem to pendulum between feeling very faithful and far from earthly things then slide to being comfortable with earthly things and feeling far from God.

So far we’ve discussed the questions regarding divorce, the “equality of sins”, and how to build bridges with those of the GLBT community.

If you have any more questions, feel free to leave them in comment below.  These can be anonymous or not.  I look forward to seeing you all tomorrow night!

Mac Heaven

Enough said!

(via losingcontext.com)